I had an absolutely horrible night last night. I barely slept and when I did my sleep was filled with unpleasant dreams.
But when I stumbled on this, some time around 5 am, it all seemed worthwhile. And how does one stumble upon things in the middle of the night these days? Why on the internet of course! Somehow, I don't remember how, I ended up at the blog Roo kept way back in 2007-2008 when I was sick. This little essay was penned by son Michael some time in February of 2008, and while I have no recollection of it at the time, I was quite moved by it now. Enjoy!
The State of Mike's Life
The last five months of my life have been perhaps the most influential on me. I could have never seen this coming. The celebration of my 21st birthday was a surreal one - not really because I turned 21 and I'm becoming an "adult" (whatever that means) - but because it seemed to mark a point in which a few important aspects of my life met. I've realized that I have matured quite a bit in these five months; I can hardly believe that this is me. I do feel like a different person, in some ways. Not because of any arbitrary number designated as my age, but because of what I have accomplished and experienced recently. I've grown to be more independent (although I still have a long ways to go) but even more incredibly to me, my perspective on life has changed very distinctly.
As many of you know, at the end of August of last year, I went on an educational exchange through the University of Western Ontario to the University of Copenhagen in Copenhagen, Denmark. I spent an incredible four months in Copenhagen, getting to know and understand Danish life and culture and meeting amazing people from all across the world.
It was all the little things, which are just part of ordinary every day life that I witnessed in my new surroundings, that really had an impact on me. For example, I was pretty impressed by the simple idea that most of the population got around town and rode to work on a bike; that a huge chunk of people are simultaneously remaining active and healthy while saving on the enormous strains put on the environment by carbon dioxide emissions.
It was the Danish's simple philosophy of hygge that got to me. Hygge can be roughly translated as meaning cosiness, but this is simply inadequate. It is much more than that - it's a way of life for the Danes. Hygge is all about experiencing a friendly and uncomplicated atmosphere, usually where friends can eat and drink and just be merry. The Danes do everything in their power to create this hyggelig atmosphere. Cafes and bars across the city are lit with candles; cafes often filled with couches and pillows; blankets provided on all outdoor seats at restaurants. Friends and family get together and make dinner. People socialize while sitting on the sofa sipping from a glass of wine and listening to some good music. The Danes go out to have fun with other people, in settings and on weekends that are described as being hyggelig (roughly pronounced hoog-a-lee). It may be hard to pronounce, but it's definitely not hard to experience. I experienced it everywhere in Copenhagen, and I marvel at how happy people can be and how much fun they can create despite the usually grey, dreary weather there. They take the weather and give it the finger. They don’t let it dictate how they feel; they decide to make every day life enjoyable through their own means. This way of life, this way of looking at life, is so fulfilling. It made me think, if only everyone in the world could take this perspective, we would feel so much more settled in life.
I found time to travel to Amsterdam, Stockholm, and even took a road trip across Norway with four of the most incredible people I've ever met. (Norway is a really beautiful country, too). I saw different ways of life, different cultures, learned history, saw art, and came to appreciate all of it. I began to question my own way of life, my own set of beliefs, and felt like I was missing out on all of these different ways to live. I couldn't have possibly thought my narrow, Canadian view was all there is, right? My experiences abroad have enlightened me. They have made me become more aware, more thoughtful, more experienced, and in sum: a wiser person. And I’m very happy for that.
Aside from the experiences, living on my own in a foreign country was a whole new test for me. I've never been away from home for such a long period - heck, I've never actually travelled before, not independently at least. It was a new experience to have to tackle everything on my own, especially as a traveller and being in a whole new environment. There were no parents for me to call up for advice or for comfort. I was a real man now, and had to get things done on my own and with my own convictions. Some things were easier than I expected. Once I stepped on the plane to Copenhagen, it seems I knew there was no turning back, and somehow I knew just how to handle everything. And yet it was still a challenge, and I feel better equipped to take on the world now that I've met that challenge.
My travelling and exchange abroad, however, are not the only experiences to have changed me during this time. Only a few weeks into being on exchange, near the end of September, I was contacted by my father through email who proceeded to tell me that he had been diagnosed with throat cancer. That's right, the dreaded "c" word. During the first month after that, I was, to say the least, carrying a lot of emotional baggage and found it really hard to cope with the situation. It didn't help that I was across the ocean, away from all family and away from my dad, while this was happening. At the time, the task of dealing with the fact that my father had cancer seemed enormous and unendurable. I can only imagine how my dad felt, and am thus amazed that he handled it so remarkably well.
My father now nears what is hopefully a complete and full recovery. He's gone through a gruelling 3 months of chemotherapy and radiation, which has left his throat in an unfortunately lousy condition. Without going into too many details, he simply has been made to feel utterly craptacular for months ever since he began treatment, and he has had to endure a lot. Some of these effects will remain with him for life. All I can say is that my dad is an incredibly brave, strong, selfless, persevering, and passionate individual, and my only goal in life is to emulate him. If I can do that, I've succeeded.
The point of this is that my viewpoint now is completely different from what it was at the time. I now find myself looking at the enormous positives that this whole situation brought about. For one, I've never been prouder of my family. My mother has been a rock for my father, a role reversal from before. I've seen kindness and insight from my brothers that I've never seen before. And my entire extended family has been ridiculously supportive and helpful. I've seen a lot of goodness in a lot of people, and it makes me happy to see that people are so completely capable of this. Furthermore, I've come to appreciate my family and my friends even more than I did before. There is always something we take for granted and we never do realize how valuable it is until something like this happens.
Ultimately, my experiences in Denmark where it felt like every moment is so valued; my experiences abroad in many countries with different people with different views; and my experiences through my dad as he battled cancer - all of this ties back to perspective. I am able to put things in perspective. It's about time that I uncomplicate life and come to realize what truly is important to me.And this couldn't have come at a better time, as I near the end of my 3rd year of my undergraduate degree (in sociology of all disciplines). Soon, I will need to start thinking about "real life" and what I'm going to do with my life and who I want to be as a person.
I still don't have the answers. I don’t magically know what to do now. I can say, however, that I know I want to uncomplicate my life. That I am more confident than ever that the world isn’t as terrible as it seems, because I know too many people who make the world feel so great to me. And that whatever I do...I'm now in a better position than I was before, thanks to some experiences that were very fortunate, and some that weren't really so fortunate, but have changed me nonetheless, in a very positive way.
I’m reminded of and leave you with one of my favourite quotes:
“Let the world change you… and you can change the world.”
But when I stumbled on this, some time around 5 am, it all seemed worthwhile. And how does one stumble upon things in the middle of the night these days? Why on the internet of course! Somehow, I don't remember how, I ended up at the blog Roo kept way back in 2007-2008 when I was sick. This little essay was penned by son Michael some time in February of 2008, and while I have no recollection of it at the time, I was quite moved by it now. Enjoy!
The State of Mike's Life
The last five months of my life have been perhaps the most influential on me. I could have never seen this coming. The celebration of my 21st birthday was a surreal one - not really because I turned 21 and I'm becoming an "adult" (whatever that means) - but because it seemed to mark a point in which a few important aspects of my life met. I've realized that I have matured quite a bit in these five months; I can hardly believe that this is me. I do feel like a different person, in some ways. Not because of any arbitrary number designated as my age, but because of what I have accomplished and experienced recently. I've grown to be more independent (although I still have a long ways to go) but even more incredibly to me, my perspective on life has changed very distinctly.
As many of you know, at the end of August of last year, I went on an educational exchange through the University of Western Ontario to the University of Copenhagen in Copenhagen, Denmark. I spent an incredible four months in Copenhagen, getting to know and understand Danish life and culture and meeting amazing people from all across the world.
It was all the little things, which are just part of ordinary every day life that I witnessed in my new surroundings, that really had an impact on me. For example, I was pretty impressed by the simple idea that most of the population got around town and rode to work on a bike; that a huge chunk of people are simultaneously remaining active and healthy while saving on the enormous strains put on the environment by carbon dioxide emissions.
It was the Danish's simple philosophy of hygge that got to me. Hygge can be roughly translated as meaning cosiness, but this is simply inadequate. It is much more than that - it's a way of life for the Danes. Hygge is all about experiencing a friendly and uncomplicated atmosphere, usually where friends can eat and drink and just be merry. The Danes do everything in their power to create this hyggelig atmosphere. Cafes and bars across the city are lit with candles; cafes often filled with couches and pillows; blankets provided on all outdoor seats at restaurants. Friends and family get together and make dinner. People socialize while sitting on the sofa sipping from a glass of wine and listening to some good music. The Danes go out to have fun with other people, in settings and on weekends that are described as being hyggelig (roughly pronounced hoog-a-lee). It may be hard to pronounce, but it's definitely not hard to experience. I experienced it everywhere in Copenhagen, and I marvel at how happy people can be and how much fun they can create despite the usually grey, dreary weather there. They take the weather and give it the finger. They don’t let it dictate how they feel; they decide to make every day life enjoyable through their own means. This way of life, this way of looking at life, is so fulfilling. It made me think, if only everyone in the world could take this perspective, we would feel so much more settled in life.
I found time to travel to Amsterdam, Stockholm, and even took a road trip across Norway with four of the most incredible people I've ever met. (Norway is a really beautiful country, too). I saw different ways of life, different cultures, learned history, saw art, and came to appreciate all of it. I began to question my own way of life, my own set of beliefs, and felt like I was missing out on all of these different ways to live. I couldn't have possibly thought my narrow, Canadian view was all there is, right? My experiences abroad have enlightened me. They have made me become more aware, more thoughtful, more experienced, and in sum: a wiser person. And I’m very happy for that.
Aside from the experiences, living on my own in a foreign country was a whole new test for me. I've never been away from home for such a long period - heck, I've never actually travelled before, not independently at least. It was a new experience to have to tackle everything on my own, especially as a traveller and being in a whole new environment. There were no parents for me to call up for advice or for comfort. I was a real man now, and had to get things done on my own and with my own convictions. Some things were easier than I expected. Once I stepped on the plane to Copenhagen, it seems I knew there was no turning back, and somehow I knew just how to handle everything. And yet it was still a challenge, and I feel better equipped to take on the world now that I've met that challenge.
My travelling and exchange abroad, however, are not the only experiences to have changed me during this time. Only a few weeks into being on exchange, near the end of September, I was contacted by my father through email who proceeded to tell me that he had been diagnosed with throat cancer. That's right, the dreaded "c" word. During the first month after that, I was, to say the least, carrying a lot of emotional baggage and found it really hard to cope with the situation. It didn't help that I was across the ocean, away from all family and away from my dad, while this was happening. At the time, the task of dealing with the fact that my father had cancer seemed enormous and unendurable. I can only imagine how my dad felt, and am thus amazed that he handled it so remarkably well.
My father now nears what is hopefully a complete and full recovery. He's gone through a gruelling 3 months of chemotherapy and radiation, which has left his throat in an unfortunately lousy condition. Without going into too many details, he simply has been made to feel utterly craptacular for months ever since he began treatment, and he has had to endure a lot. Some of these effects will remain with him for life. All I can say is that my dad is an incredibly brave, strong, selfless, persevering, and passionate individual, and my only goal in life is to emulate him. If I can do that, I've succeeded.
The point of this is that my viewpoint now is completely different from what it was at the time. I now find myself looking at the enormous positives that this whole situation brought about. For one, I've never been prouder of my family. My mother has been a rock for my father, a role reversal from before. I've seen kindness and insight from my brothers that I've never seen before. And my entire extended family has been ridiculously supportive and helpful. I've seen a lot of goodness in a lot of people, and it makes me happy to see that people are so completely capable of this. Furthermore, I've come to appreciate my family and my friends even more than I did before. There is always something we take for granted and we never do realize how valuable it is until something like this happens.
Ultimately, my experiences in Denmark where it felt like every moment is so valued; my experiences abroad in many countries with different people with different views; and my experiences through my dad as he battled cancer - all of this ties back to perspective. I am able to put things in perspective. It's about time that I uncomplicate life and come to realize what truly is important to me.And this couldn't have come at a better time, as I near the end of my 3rd year of my undergraduate degree (in sociology of all disciplines). Soon, I will need to start thinking about "real life" and what I'm going to do with my life and who I want to be as a person.
I still don't have the answers. I don’t magically know what to do now. I can say, however, that I know I want to uncomplicate my life. That I am more confident than ever that the world isn’t as terrible as it seems, because I know too many people who make the world feel so great to me. And that whatever I do...I'm now in a better position than I was before, thanks to some experiences that were very fortunate, and some that weren't really so fortunate, but have changed me nonetheless, in a very positive way.
I’m reminded of and leave you with one of my favourite quotes:
“Let the world change you… and you can change the world.”
"Many a treasure besides Ali Baba's is unlocked with a verbal key."---Henry Van Dyke
Love
Peter
Man, who is that person?? Amazing that you stumbled upon this - I forgot I wrote it. Somehow, it feels like I needed to read this from my old self right now. :) This brings back so many memories!! Everything I mentioned in the essay, plus I remember coming back home for your vow renewals and to see you. I love you so much! <3
ReplyDeleteLove,
Michael
Beautiful :)
ReplyDeleteJust amazing .. Michael, Peter, Roo! And I have the honour of being adopted into this family. I have experienced your love and support, and am humbled by all of it.
ReplyDeleteLove, gail
That Michael...he's something.
ReplyDelete